October 2003

Stories of the Incredible, Flying Kitty

If you had been passing our apartment that day, you might have seen the following: A big orange kitty on the second story windowsill. He sniffs the breeze and slinks his front paws a bit down the brick wall. He... more

Stories of the Incredible, Drooling Kitty Cat

My boyfriend's kitty cat used to drool. Whenever you scratched his ears, which he loves, a little drop of saliva went splat on the ground. Drip, drip, drip, like a leaky faucet. I've always hated cats, but the drooling endeared... more

Infrequently Asked Questions, Part 537

Where are you, and what are you doing? I'm a freelance writer. Apparently, that means I write for free. I'm visiting Austin for the week, but I live in Dallas with my boyfriend. Dallas is a place, like L.A., that... more

Buffalo 3, Elk 0

For those of you unfamiliar with Texas businesses, Central Market is a grand, trendy iconoclast of a grocery store. It sells African cola but no Pepsi. Five thousand cheeses, none of them Kraft. It is a labyrinth of luxurious foods... more

You Can't Make This Up

Last July I spent three days at the Mary Kay 40th anniversary seminar. This is a yearly event, in which 53,000 women in business suits descend on downtown Dallas for a series of motivational sessions at the Convention Center. I... more

But Who's Looking Out for Bill O'Reilly?

When I first saw Bill O'Reilly, he was hosting A Current Affair. While I munched on potato chips, waiting for Oprah to start, he brought me breaking news about serial killers and Princess Diana. Who knew he was so full... more

Nuclear Sub

Recently, I started substitute teaching. I had some time on my hands and a few exorbitant speeding tickets to handle. So I xeroxed my certification, took a test - a TB test, that is -- and before I knew it,... more

Saw Your Piece

Recently, I have had the great fortune to contribute a few pieces to The New York Times. My latest, about comedian Margaret Cho, ran last Sunday. On occasion, I receive lovely emails from friends congratulating me on it or complimenting... more

Since We Last Spoke

It's been six months and several reality television shows since we last spoke. Boy, a lot has happened. For one, I got a haircut. It's been described as "cute" and "short." It's very, umm, business casual. It requires blowdrying and... more