avorite Store Name That Could Also Be the Title of My Autobiography
Funny Cry Happy

Strangest Casting in a Broadway Musical
John Stamos in Cabaret (Guess that will be a FULL HOUSE. Ba-da-BOOM!)

Free Shows in Central Park This Week
Cornershop, Barry Manilow, Julia Stiles and Jimmy Smits in Twelfth Night, Charlie Daniels Band, New York Grand Opera

Best Misunderstanding
Last Saturday, my friend gets off the subway to find a large black man on a stool yelling, "There is no power below 14th Street!" She keeps moving, thinks it's another political rant. Then she looks around and realizes, no really: There's NO POWER. A blown transformer at the power supplier Con-Ed left downtown Manhattan in blackout for part of the afternoon.

Evidence That It's Okay to Ask for Directions
I am looking at a map with frustration, like always. I want to be here but I am there. Or am I there? It's confusing. I fold up the map and decide to turn back around. A total "fuck it" moment.
Him: Can I help you find something?
Me: No, I'm ... uh, I'm just going the wrong way.
Him: Oh. Okay.
Me: I'm looking for the Corner Bistro.
Him: The Corner Bistro? It's right there.
Me: Oh. Wow. Thanks. You just saved me like an hour.
Him: Don't mention it.
(And the Corner Bistro? Medium rare burgers for $5. Go in the middle of the afternoon, when the crowds are gone. Mmm-mmm.)

A Sport for People Who Know Almost Nothing About Sports
Baseball left Brooklyn in 1958 when the Dodgers moved to Los Angeles. Last year, the city opened a stadium on Coney Island for their new minor league team, named for the beachfront amusement park's notorious shocker the Cyclone. What was once (I hear) a kind of creepy, run-down place is now one of the best family afternoons in the city. The Brooklyn Cyclones are breaking minor-league attendance records, and everyone's enjoying the peculiar romance of Coney Island: the beach, the rides, and the Nathan's hot dogs!

Best Reason to Quit Smoking, Stupid
Me: American Spirits, blue box.
Her: That'll be $7.50.
Me: Oh. Really? Oh. Well then how about Marlboro's?
Her: $7.50.
Me: Camels?
Her: BLANK LOOK
Me: Harley Davidson's?
Her: BLANK LOOK
Me: Any specials?
Her: American Spirits, $7.50
Me: I'll take one box, please.